porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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