I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
