STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
