Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Randomize