vagina is talking i cant
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
