Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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