Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
All the doctor said was why
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
