Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
