no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
the liver wants what the liver wants
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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