Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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