real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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