She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
