Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
