Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
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