i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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