so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
