We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I would fuck him just for his dog
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
