no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
