she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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