so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
