He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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