what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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