Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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