you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
The air taste purple.
Randomize
