Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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