This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
