I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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