Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
