tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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