We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
