Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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