Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
