I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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