I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Randomize
