I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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