Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Randomize
