guys are not supposed to queef...right?
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
