Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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