new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
