Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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