That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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