just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
