Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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