Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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