I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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