I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Can you bring me the toilet please
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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