She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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