Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
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