I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize