Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
